For the past year I've been taking voice lessons.
I have taken them for much of the past 20 years of my life, but this past year I have truly found my voice.
I had taken a break from singing for a while. And during that time I let myself develop really bad habits. Mostly, I had found a way to keep my voice trapped inside my throat. I would actually control things too much -- tightening my jaw and my tongue, overthinking my vowels... I had been holding my voice in so much that it was actually hard for other people to hear the powerful beauty I had hiding inside of me!
Really all I needed to do was relax and let it all go. And now, for the first time, I'm able to hear my voice resonate beautifully and without pain or adjustment. It just flies and rings!
At first I was very resistant to my teacher's instruction. Admittedly, I didn't really like the way I sounded. My voice was unrecognizable... and I wasn't used to feeling that way. But now, I realize it was worth risking a change. I actually hear my voice differently!
It has taken me an entire year to undo the damage I've done to myself.
Today at my lesson I will sing a song that I think is appropriate. I wanted to share the words with you.
Anyone Can Whistle
Anyone can whistle.
That's what they say,
"Easy."
Anyone can whistle
any old day.
Easy.
It's all so simple
Relax, let go, let fly.
So someone tell me why can't I?
I can dance a tango,
I can read Greek.
Easy.
I can slay a dragon
any old week.
Easy.
What's hard is simple
What's natural comes hard.
Maybe you could show me
how to let go,
lower my guard,
learn to be free
Maybe you could whistle,
whistle for me.
My dear friends, it has taken me a long time to learn the most simple things in this world. I have easily accomplished what many people call hard:
I have run a marathon.
I have a master's degree from an ivy league school.
I have accomplished my career goal to produce for network television news.
But the hardest thing I've had to gain was not something I had to attain. Rather, it's been something I've had to find within myself.
The hardest thing for me to do, was in essence, the most simple thing of all.
What's hard is simple
What's natural comes hard.
I have finally learned how to have JOY. I have finally learned that my purpose here is indeed very beautiful and simple: to be happy. And I have finally opened my heart to its many possibilities.
Because love, for all of us, is so possible.
I have finally begun allowing myself to learn and embrace the beautiful blessings of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I know, without a doubt, that the Lord wants me to be happy. I know, without a doubt, that He has blessings I cannot even imagine waiting for me. And I know, that all I have to do is let His love in and allow it to shine through me.
Other people can finally hear my true voice.
It's all so simple
Relax, let go, let fly.
The Atonement of Jesus Christ is not only the biggest blessing in my life; it is my life source. Without it, I would continue controlling everything in my life and letting myself get in the way of my own happiness. I would still be seeking happiness instead of just letting it in.
Obviously I'm still in training. I'm still a work in progress. I don't assume to be perfect or even perfectly happy today. But I'm really enjoying the journey.
This morning I awoke with an even more powerful realization of the love the Lord has to offer me. I continually see His hand in my life and, to be honest, I'm continually amazed to feel that He can love me even more than I'm allowing him to.
I'm in the midst of deciding "what's next" for me. I keep asking, "Lord, what would you have me do?" And I'm excited to know that the opportunities for me are endless.
I am a very blessed person.
I am a very loved person.
And I want you to know that you are too!